Bronwyn Bishop cracked under pressure from Sky News accusations on Wednesday, buying a goat farm in the New South Wales Hunter Valley Region. She said it was a bid to show pundits she has, and always will be a woman, ‘From the people, for the people.‘
She later said that the shock purchase in the Hunter Valley Region had nothing to do with her rich taste in wine, and that ever since she was a little girl, she had always loved goats.
‘Deep, deep down, I’m just a simple blue-collar worker who understands the needs of the people,’ She said.
After a report published by the Herald Sun on Wednesday, the former MP insisted she did nothing wrong when she chartered a helicopter that cost $5750 to attend a liberal party function back in 2015.
‘Give me a break!’ She screamed when asked about the report.
Neighbours of Ms Bishop’s goat farm say she’s up to her old tricks again, arriving in her helicopter every morning to throw out bits of old bread while belting out the chorus to Famous Rapper Eminem’s hit song, Not Afraid.
“I think she thinks they are ducks,” Said one resident neighbour.
Ms Bishop charged the public purse for costs relating to 11 trips, including colleagues’ weddings and media mogul Kerry Packer’s funeral, according to a Department of Finance probe.
Ms Bishop insisted that, ‘None of any of that had anything to do with my ‘greed’ or my ‘pleasure’.
Her partner says things are spiraling out of control, “Last week she spent $3000 on a drone for no reason whatsoever. She just holds it above her head and runs around the house naked yelling ‘wee…wee…wee’. I told her it can actually fly, but she just doesn’t listen.”
Peter Slipper never understood what Ms Bishop wanted when she demanded he, ‘do the helicopter’.
Ms Bishop offered no comment on her goat farm, or on her persistent demands of random people to show her, ‘their best helicopter’.